Beautiful Curse
by xNightValkyrie
Summary: She's just a mere villager of Konohagakure who's fallen in love, but why did her love decide to leave her with such huge scars? What will she do? KakashixOC - One-shot.


Disclaimer : I don't own Naruto, but I own Kitsugushi Kaori =)

Enjoy reading! Reviews would be appreciated! =3

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><p>The morning breeze felt fresh, renewing, and comfortable against my skin as it blew by me. I smiled at the thought of <em>him<em>, standing under the tree, smiling sheepishly at me, his left hand stretched out to the back of his neck. His other hand stretched out to reach mine. I sat down on the grass, joy filling my thoughts.

Every day, we would hang out here, every day, at the same time. And every night, every evening, every afternoon, I'd be so eager that the day will pass quicker, so morning would arrive sooner, and I'll be able to spend time with _him_ again. I would wait patiently as the moment of the day arrives, I would delicately prepare myself before meeting up with _him_ every day. I would want him to see me in a perfect way that would render me unique in _his_ eyes and make _him_ remember about me forever.

He was more than a genin, more than a chuunin. He was a jounin. He fights for our village and defends our country. I admired him, and I admire him in every way, he was everything to me, like the village was everything to him. He was perfect in every way for me. Too perfect.

Every day was the same routine, I come here every morning and wait for _him_ to come. And then we would talk about random stuffs. He would talk about his students, I would talk about my day as an artist. I draw and sell my painting, my drawings, everything I make, but anything related to _him_, I keep them to myself, I treasure them.

I looked at the sun as the breeze brushed against my brown hair. The sunlight was getting stronger, so strong to the point it was blinding me from just a peek. It was abnormally sunny.

I bit my lips. How long have I been waiting? Usually, it didn't take long for him to come, but today, it felt like hours. He was never late with me. I was the only one making him always late.

I stood up and looked towards the village. When will he be coming? Why is he late? I looked around, seeing no sign of _him_. I sighed, _maybe_ he overslept?

Being my usual self, I would appear at his front door and knock open his door if that was the case… but I didn't know where he lived. We haven't been with each other in other places than _here_, under this big giant willow tree.

I sat back down and took out my sketchbook, a pencil and a box of pastels. _I'll try to kill some time with that…_ I drew the first thing that came into my mind : a dried red rose with thorns. The rest of the drawing seemed to draw itself quite easily : a crimson red swirl - filling it with black - ending with a tail at its left, light blue abstract sway on the left of the rose, dark pink line on the other side, ending it with a midnight blue finish for the background.

I looked at my completed drawing, the feeling it gave me was different from the others. Usually, my art would be more colourful, more towards the light colors, but the use of the dark colors in this made my heart tremble. It was so dark it didn't look normal to me, it felt out of place.

I bit my lips. _He_ said my drawings were like premonitions. Everytime I drew something new, he would say that he has seen something like that the day right before. _Then does that mean that this time it is a bad premonition?_ I bit my lips again. I closed my sketchbook and put back everything into the case. I looked up.

Worry washed over me. The sun was already starting to set.

He would have told me if he had a mission out of town. He would have told me if he was busy. He would have told me if he couldn't come. What had happened?

I felt something taking over my worry. What was that feeling? My heart was going thousands of beat per second. My head was throbbing. I felt a sudden rush of adrenaline. I recognized this feeling. It was _fear_. But why was I afraid?

Suddenly, I heard something. Something I recognized far too easily.

"Here, here, you guys can go home now." It was _his_ voice.

I stood up and looked towards his direction and saw _him_.

Hatake Kakashi.

My legs brought me forward, towards his direction.

"Kakashi!" I yelled and saw him halt to a stop along with three children. They were probably his students. I let my legs lead me towards him as he waited on his spot.

He looked different. Different from how I knew him. I don't know it was from my running or it was really my heart, but I felt it beat against my rib cage ten times quicker than it was five minutes ago.

"Kaori? What are you doing here?" Somehow, as I heard his sentence, I felt my heart drop.

"I-I… Why… Why didn't you come… this morning?" I swallowed a lump in my throat. What was I saying?

The small extension of his eye was the only expression I've registered since I saw him, today.

"Oh, that. I forgot about it. You shouldn't be coming here anymore either, I won't be having any time to waste anymore."

_I won't be having any time to waste anymore._

_Waste._

_Waste._

_Waste._

"W-Waste…?" What does he mean… _waste_? "W-what do you mean?"

I couldn't see clearly anymore. Everything became blurry around me. I could only see the frown his eye made.

"Wasn't it clear enough?" he sighed. "I really didn't want to say it so bluntly, but I want to get things straight. What I meant was that I was just fooling around, just to kill off some time. I never took anything seriously. And now I woke up, I was _wasting_ my time around you."

I felt my sketchbook and stuffs fall from my grip.

_I was wasting my time around you_.

What's that numb feeling creeping over my limbs?

_I was wasting my time around you_.

What's that stabbing pain in my chest?

_I was wasting my time around you_.

What's that cruel voice repeating in my head?

_I was wasting my time around you_.

What… what am I doing…?

It was when my knees gave up that I knew he had left. It was when I knew he left that I knew my eyes were red from crying. And then… I felt one drop of water.

Two drops.

And it didn't stop.

I looked at my clothes, drenched from the rain.

I felt like I was betrayed.

I sat in the middle of the clearing. Maybe, _maybe_ the rain is going wash away my pain?

_Maybe_ the cold will kill my feelings…?

_Maybe_… this darkness… will relieve me… from _every… thing_…?

**Two days later**

*beep* *beep* *beep*

"I'm sorry Tsunade-sama." A distant voice. I couldn't recognize it.

Even though they felt heavy, I tried to open my eyes.

I looked around.

"T-Tsunade… -sama?" was the first thing I said, seeing as the Hokage is there, tending to an unimportant person like me. "What am I doing here…?" I looked at her eyebrows frown as I asked my question.

"Someone found you unconscious close to the training ground under the rain… They brought you here."

_I was wasting my time around you_.

She then smiled at me.

"How do you feel?"

I don't know. I don't feel sad. I don't feel pissed. I don't feel angry. I don't feel joy. Nothing.

"I don't know." I sat up, looking at her. She was looking at me with that puzzled expression. "I can't feel anything." I clarified. I saw her eyes grow big. "Emotionally." I felt like I needed to add this.

"Why?" I looked at her once again, meeting her soft gaze.

_Maybe the cold _did_ kill my feelings_.

"I don't know."

_Or maybe it killed my heart_.

I heard a sigh. I looked up to see Tsunade-sama taking her leave.

"Glad to see you awake. Take some time to rest. You have a big day coming." A big day? What? What is she talking about?

I looked out at the window on my right. _What is the big day Tsunade-sama is talking about?_ I looked at the sun. It told me that it was still early, very early in the morning. Like the _other day_, the breeze was blowing on the trees and levitating the leaves from the ground. _Like the other day_, my life wouldn't be the same anymore.

A glimpse of black and red caught my eyes as I turned further to see my sketchbook opened, lying on the nightstand beside me.

A _bad premonition_, heh? True enough.

"Kaori?" Huh? I turned towards the entrance, seeing a black haired woman with red eyes.

"Kurenai?" I looked as she hurried in.

"What are you doing here, Kaori?" I didn't really know why myself, how did I end up here…? "Don't you have a wedding coming up? You shouldn't be in the hospital at this time!" Wait. What? Wedding? What wedding? What is she talking about? I've never heard of any wedding being held these days…

"Wedding? What are you talking about?" I saw her eyes widen. How many times have I seen this expression already?

"Nobody told you? This guy from Suna came here just a few days ago to complete the treaty between Suna and Konoha! Don't you remember?" _Suna…?_

"_Kurenai!" round red orbs looked at my way as I ran towards her._

"_Kaori?" I jumped on her, hugging her as tight as I could, sobbing my heart out."What happened?"_

"_M-my parents! T-They're h-having me marry s-some g-guy from S-suna!" I felt like my life was being ripped away from me._

I clenched my fists. _I totally forgot about that…_ Wait… No… The engagement was supposed to have being cancelled due to both side's parents death.

"Wasn't the engagement… cancelled?" I asked her.

"It doesn't seem so… The guy came and said that it was in his parents' will that he has to marry you, Kitsugushi Kaori, the survivor of the Kitsugushi clan."

The _Kitsugushi clan_… It's been a long time I haven't heard this name… One of the strongest clan of Konohagakure, wiped out sixteen years ago, due to an 'accidental' explosion caused by some kind of research, ironic, isn't it…? I was only eight years old at that time… I had the chance to escape the path of death, because Kurenai and I were out playing.

"Kaori?" I looked at her.

"I need to talk to Tsunade-sama."

"Huh?"

"I'm not going to marry him and give away my life to some guy I've never met."

"But it's for the treaty-"

"I know. I will put my life on the line if I have to." Life has nothing more to offer me. I thought that life has offered me too much, that life had offered someone too perfect too me, that's why it took everything from me now. Everything that I cherished was gone within a single sentence. Death was becoming more welcoming than life.

"You're c-" I tried to smile. But I couldn't feel this feeling within me anymore.

"Kurenai." I looked at her. For the slightest moment since _that day_, I felt tiny bit of emotion : sadness. "My parents are dead… my siblings are dead… my entire clan was wiped out… The one I love left me… And now… my life is being manipulated, torn away from me…" I looked down at my hands. They were trembling, shaking. "I have nothing else to live for…"

"But-"

"Please, Kurenai… Let me be selfish… just this once." I looked at her, deep into her eyes.

We had been friends for almost twenty years, I knew she cared as much as I cared, but I felt like I had no more options… This was my last turn, and it was a one way route, leading to a dead-end.

I looked away from her eyes. The tears she shed for me threatened me to stay. Wordlessly, I turned towards the side and put my feet to the cold floor, walking towards my clean clothes.

[…]

*knock* *knock*

"Come in." a small voice said. I turned the doorknob and opened the door, seeing Tsunade-sama and a black haired man looking at me.

"Is that her?" He said. He was probably _the guy_. I looked at the Hokage as she nodded. I clenched my fists.

"Not anymore." Somehow, my voice felt sore as I spoke. The man, whose name I remember as Kiyusuni something, looked at me bewildered, matching Tsunade-sama's expression. I bowed politely. "I came here to _ask_ for a cancellation of the engagement."

"What are you talking about?" I almost thought that the desk would crumble under her as she slammed her palms on it. With her insane strength, who would have known?

I took a deep breath.

"I want to cancel the engagement." I repeated with a slightly louder voice.

"Kaori, do you know what you're talking about?" I somehow felt that the air around the room was different all of a sudden - it felt tense, harder to breathe in.

"I won't accept any cancellation." His voice irritated me. I looked towards that Suna guy. He held that proud look that I hated so much, like everything was below him. Even the frown on his face couldn't erase that look out of his features.

At the thought of not being able to cancel the engagement, I felt like everything fell apart, like there was no more hope. All I could let myself do was fall to my knees, and let my blood boil and let my control loose…

"Tsunade-sama, I'm willing to give the rest of my life to Konohagakure, but if it is to marry some guy and live the rest of my life in a cage, I'd rather spill every last drop of my blood to get away from this arrangement." The control I had left was over my trembling body and my voice. It was the lowest and the most polite I could keep it.

"… ha…. Haha…. HahahaHaHAHA!" I looked over at the laughing man, hearing my knuckles crack. "Do you think I'll back away because of your little threat? If you do, then your underestimating me." His expression changed immediately. He was looking back at me with a serious look, no more showing that proud expression he had, because all I could see was anger.

Facing his anger, I didn't know what to feel. I could only feel some small muscles pulling at the corner of my lips, slightly guessing that I was smirking. From what? I don't know. I just felt my way in my waist pouch and took out a kunai, a very precious kunai that I kept with me at all time. I threatened my own life as I connect the weapon that was supposed to protect me from danger to my neck.

"Kaori!"

"KAORI!" the window glass shattered on the floor as a masked man jumped in. It was at his sight that I felt anger rising inside me. I _would_ kill myself right in front of him and make him regret everything he's said to me.

"I'm not kidding." I glared back at the black haired man. His expression changed once again, this time, it was something people called _terror_.

"Kaori, put down the kunai! NOW!" Tsunade-sama's voice resonated in my ear, but I wouldn't tear my gaze from the man who was going to take my life away. Towards my immobility, she only sighed. "Takeishin-san, do you think it really is necessary to do this? She won't be marrying you in any case."

"I don't care! She's the one _destined_ to bear my child!"

_Destined_? Right.

I released my kunai, making a metallic sound as it crashed on the floor.

"Do you really want to marry me this much? At the cost of your own life?" I smirked. Hope was resurfacing once again. I totally forgot about my family's _curse_.

"What do you mean?" his expression amused me.

"_Kaori_…?" this voice, that I happened to love so much, stabbed pins in my chest. What was that feeling called again? I couldn't ignore it, but thinking that I was an inch from regaining my liberty, I smirked even more.

"The Kitsugushi clan was _indeed_ the strongest clan in Konohagakure… but it also had a weakness, or so I call it." The room went silent as I talked. "It is our _curse_." I tried catching the three different expressions in the room. Shock, shock, and… _sadness_? I looked at Kakashi. Did he know about my family curse?

"I've heard about it." So he does know. "The Kitsugushi clan was a very large clan before, but the numbers of people decreased considerably, due to their _curse_." His gaze turned to me, and for some reason, I couldn't read his expression anymore. "Anyone who marries the daughters of the Kitsugushi clan will _die_." I stared down. Many members of my family had died because of this _curse_. "More precisely, anyone who isn't _destined_ to marry them will die, along with their clan."

"Then this causes no problem! She was destined to be mine the moment our parents arranged the engagement!" I smirked. I knew better. My parents never wanted us to unite from the beginning. They just wanted to wipe off the Kiyusuni clan.

"It is not a decision of the parents, but from the two beings that are being united." I remembered what my mother had told me.

"I don't get it!"

"The Kitsugushi clan is a strong clan, yet, it is also the most _selfish_ clan." I closed my eyes. "Every member with the Kitsugushi blood in them has a very special Kekkei Genkai, the Ginyorugan." I felt the burn within my eyes as I reopened them.

"_Silver eyes_…

"You must've heard about it… That is why you want to make this bloodline your own, by marrying me." The truth was always cruel to me. "But it is also the _Ginyorugan_'s curse that kills anyone that we marry, so that the Kekkei Genkai would not be passed down to any other clans by any means." Though… this curse was embed into us to prevent other clans from _stealing_ the Ginyorugan… But there is a secret within the family that _only_ the father can pass down this bloodline to his children. "So if you marry me, you'll die. For plainly _nothing at all_."

I never really understood _why_ the ancestors did this. It was like a double layer of protection, and everything was for that _bloodline_...

I smelled the blood that trickled down the man's fists, the smell made me sick, it reminded me of the night when I saw my whole family being burnt down. The smell of blood and ashes, mixed with the yells of agony. I could do _nothing at all_.

I turned on my heels and headed for the door.

**Two years and a half later**

"Kaori!"

I turned around, seeing a black haired woman running towards me. I smiled. I haven't seen her in ages.

"Kurenai!" I waved at her as she halted in front of me.

"Where have you been? I haven't seen you in almost two years!" I kept on walking, with her on my side. I almost laughed at her comment.

"What are you saying? I've been in Konoha the whole time! You were the one who was here and who-knows-where!" I smiled.

"I know. The Hokage has been sending me everywhere lately."

"But I suppose it's better than staying in the village, you get to see much more." I kind of envy Kurenai. She went everywhere, saw much more than I, knows much more than I.

"You'll get your chance soon!" she laughed. "So how's it going with Kakashi."

My legs stopped. As well as my heart.

"Kaori…?"

What was happening? I thought I got over him two years ago… but the mention of him… only makes my heart hurt.

"I haven't seen him… since that day in the Hokage's office…" I didn't know much, but my voice was losing itself.

"W-what…?"

Since that day, I haven't seen him… it was a while after that I _thought_ I had gotten over him, when I started receiving those encouraging _letters_. I still don't know who those letters are from, but I keep receiving them… _everyday_. I tried finding out once, but gave up. I still receive those _every day_, it was the only thing that kept me going on happily, that gave me hope in this world.

Every day that I wake up, the first thing I do is go out to my mailbox, to find that letter I'm always waiting for. It somehow reminded me of my daily routine, when I was seeing Kakashi… but it comforted me, no matter how much it reminded me of him.

I don't sell my painting or my drawings anymore, because every one of them was inspired by the letters I received and I can't bear to sell them off to some people who can't cherish them like I do. I keep them as a memory, with a rewritten copy of the letter on the other side.

"But I thought that you've forgiven him with all those letters he's sent you…"

"I'll never f-" wait... What? _Letters_? He was the one… who sent me all those _letters_...?

"Kaori? Are you okay?"

"He sent me… all those letters?" I looked at her as she nodded. Everything around me just turned blurry. My face was getting wet, I don't know from what though. "There's no way! He hates me!" he told me this himself. I would never forget what happened that day.

"Kaori… You must understand… Your engagement with Kiyusuni Takeishin was one of the conditions to complete the treaty…"

"The engagement was cancelled over two years ago…!" Why didn't he tell me before?

"Kaori… He told us… He couldn't face you after hurting you so much… So he…"

[…]

I looked outside, my eyes reaching the starry night. I couldn't sleep. Not after what Kurenai told me. I pulled my legs closer to my body.

I knew it all along… why couldn't I admit it? He was the only one who would do that…

"_So he… he rather said hidden by your side and protect you then hurting you a second time…"_

He's so stupid… He could've just told me… I would've forgiven him… for everything he did.

"I'm sorry…" the voice was distant, but I recognized it. I couldn't stop myself from crying anymore at this time, so I let my tears flow freely.

"I've already forgiven you…" I cried.

"I'm glad." As much as I thought, I felt Kakashi's strong arms wrap around my small form as I cried. "I won't leave your side, never again."

_**The End**_


End file.
